Sexuality in Joseph Smith’s Marriages

I’m feeling lazy, so I’m just going to quote Todd Compton, author of the uniformly excellent In Sacred Loneliness: The Plural Wives of Joseph Smith:

Sexuality in Joseph Smith’s Plural Marriages

Joseph Smith’s first wife, Emma, allegedly told the wife of Apostle George A. Smith, Lucy, that Joseph Smith’s plural wives were “celestial” only, that he had no earthly marital relations with them. “They were only sealed for eternity they were not to live with him and have children.” Lucy later wrote that when she told this to her husband:

He related to me the circumstance of his calling on Joseph late one evening and he was just taking a wash and Joseph told him that one of his wives had just been confined and Emma was the Midwife and he had been assisting her. He [George A. Smith] told me [Lucy Smith] this to prove to me that the women were married for time [as well as for eternity], as Emma had told me that Joseph never taught any such thing.

Because Reorganized Latter Day Saints claimed that Joseph Smith was not really married polygamously in the full (i.e., sexual) sense of the term, Utah Mormons (including Smith’s wives) affirmed repeatedly that he had physical sexual relations with them—despite the Victorian conventions in nineteenth-century American culture which ordinarily would have prevented any mention of sexuality.

For instance, Mary Elizabeth Rollins Lightner stated that she knew of children born to Smith’s plural wives: “I know he had six wives and I have known some of them from childhood up. I know he had three children. They told me. I think two are living today but they are not known as his children as they go by other names.” Melissa Lott Willes testified that she had been Smith’s wife “in very deed.” Emily Partridge Young said she “roomed” with Joseph the night following her marriage to him, and said that she had “carnal intercourse” with him.

Other early witnesses also affirmed this. Benjamin Johnson wrote “On the 15th of May … the Prophet again Came and at my hosue [house] ocupied the Same Room & Bed with my Sister that the month previous he had ocupied with the Daughter of the Later Bishop Partridge as his wife.” According to Joseph Bates Noble, Smith told him he had spent a night with Louisa Beaman.

When Angus Cannon, a Salt Lake City stake president, visited Joseph Smith III in 1905, the RLDS president asked rhetorically if these women were his father’s wives, then “how was it that there was no issue from them.” Cannon replied:

All I knew was that which Lucy Walker herself contends. They were so nervous and lived in such constant fear that they could not conceive. He made light of my reply. He said, “I am informed that Eliza Snow was a virgin at the time of her death.” I in turn said, “Brother Heber C. Kimball, I am informed, asked her the question if she was not a virgin although married to Joseph Smith and afterwards to Brigham Young, when she replied in a private gathering, ‘I thought you knew Joseph Smith better than that.'”

Cannon then mentioned that Sylvia Sessions Lyon, a plural wife of Smith, had had a child by him, Josephine Lyon Fisher. Josephine left an affidavit stating that her mother, Sylvia, when on her deathbed, told her that she (Josephine) was the daughter of Joseph Smith. In addition, posterity (i.e., sexuality) was an important theological element in Smith’s Abrahamic-promise justification for polygamy.

Since there is a great deal of evidence that Joseph Smith had sexual relations with his wives, one wonders why he did not have more polygamous children. However, some of his children apparently grew up under other names, as Mary Lightner suggested. Furthermore, he may not have had numerous posterity because he was not able to visit his wives regularly, both because he was often hiding from the law and because Emma, his first wife, watched him carefully. In addition, polygamy was illegal. On top of these pressures, he soon had many wives, which made it more difficult to visit all of them frequently and regularly. Since polygamists generally had favorite wives, Smith probably neglected some of his. Finally, some of his wives were married to other men in polyandrous relationships, so such wives would probably have had children by their “first husbands,” with whom they were cohabiting regularly, not by Joseph. All of these factors would have combined to limit the number of his children. However, it is clear that some of his plural wives did have children by him, if we can rely on the statements of George A. Smith, Josephine Fisher, and Elizabeth Lightner.

Despite this evidence, some have argued that Joseph did not have marital relations with his wives, using the following arguments: First, some conclude that Helen Mar Kimball, who married Smith when she was fourteen, did not have marital relations with him. This is possible, as there are cases of Mormons in Utah marrying young girls and refraining from sexuality until they were older. But the evidence for Helen Mar is entirely ambiguous, in my view.

Some, like Emma Smith, conclude that Joseph’s marriages were for eternity only, not for time (thus without earthly sexuality). But many of Joseph’s wives affirmed that they were married to him for eternity and time, with sexuality included. Eliza Snow, in her autobiography, wrote that “I was sealed to the Prophet Joseph Smith, for time and eternity, in accordance with the Celestial Law of Marriage which God has revealed.” Furthermore, there are no known instances of marriages for “eternity only” in the nineteenth century.

Some have pointed out that Mary Elizabeth Rollins Lightner said in 1905, “I … was sealed to Joseph for Eternity.” Thus, they argue, Smith had no relations with her, a polyandrous wife, as he was married to her for eternity only. However, Lightner apparently was merely emphasizing eternity in this statement; she testified in three different places that she was also sealed to Smith for time. For example, in a 1902 statement, she said, “Brigham Young Sealed me to him [Smith], for time & all eternity.”

Zina Huntington Young also had a polyandrous relationship with Smith and her first husband, Henry Jacobs. Some point out that she gave an interview in which she referred to her marriage to Smith as “eternal,” not for “time.” However, in the same interview she emphasized that she was married to the Mormon leader for time, as well:

    [Zina:] … he [Joseph Smith] married me … When Brigham Young returned from England, he repeated the ceremony for time and eternity. … I was sealed to Joseph Smith for eternity.
    [Question:] Mrs. Young, you claim, I believe, that you were not married to him “for time?”
    [Zina:] “For eternity.” I was married to Mr. Jacobs, but the marriage was unhappy and we parted …
    [Q:] Is it a fact then, Mrs. Young, that Joseph was not married to you only in the sense of being sealed “for eternity?”
    [Zina:] As his wife for time and eternity.
    [Q:] Mrs. Young, you have answered that question in two ways; for time, and for time and eternity.
    [Zina:] I meant for eternity.

Some interpreters place great weight on these statements, as showing that Zina’s marriage was “spiritual” only. But the interview is so contradictory on this issue, as the elderly Zina sounds defensive and confused while answering an RLDS judge’s harsh questions, that it cannot be used as solid evidence. One even wonders if early Mormons did not use the term “marriage for eternity” to encompass “time and eternity,” as Mormons do today.

In conclusion, though it is possible that Joseph had some marriages in which there were no sexual relations, there is not any explicit or convincing evidence for this (except, perhaps, in the cases of the older wives, judging from later Mormon polygamy). And in a significant number of marriages, there is evidence for sexual relations.

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22 Responses to Sexuality in Joseph Smith’s Marriages

  1. chriscarrollsmith says:

    Thanks for Posting this, John. I’ve not actually read Compton’s book yet, so this was useful.

  2. Mina says:

    In a way, I found the book’s length depressing, which is odd since I don’t think I’ve ever had any reaction to the size any book I’ve ever read. The practice of polygamy is so “ritually haphazard,” so made up as it went along, and so contradictory in places (multiple sealings to the same person as well as to others) as to be truly mind-boggling.

    Its just another example of how very different Joseph’s church was from any version that came after.

    • Gary O says:

      It’s still old joe’s church. Every teaching and doctrine that mormons practice and believe came from his lying lips. It’s the same church with icing to cover the evil church that was mormonism back then.

  3. sideon says:

    So hard to hold up any spiritual leader in light of their indiscretions and infidelities, up to and including fathering children while (secretly – and understandably so) married to someone else.

    Joseph Smith revered? Sure – in a “man, did he get around” kind of way.

  4. runtu says:

    Hey, Sideon,

    Nice to see you here. You know, maybe it’s just that I’ve known about this so long that it just doesn’t register anymore, but I’m really surprised that even a NOM doesn’t know that Joseph had sex with his wives, even the married ones.

    I guess you could say he got around. Maybe too much.

  5. Elder Joseph says:

    Hi Its Zeezrom from exmo.org

    Everything surrounding this Polygamy stuff is wierd , depressing and worst of all , it was all devised in Joseph Smiths head … Women were led into this disgraceful and Deceptive behaviour because they believed ( or were conditioned to believe) that Joseph Smith was Gods mouthpiece on earth …

    Its always typical that when a leader starts a religion or sect going he seems to end up having sex with his female followers .Smith said God made him do it or face a ‘Flaming Sword’.

    The more I looked into this , the more angrier it made me , especially things like Orson Pratt bedding a 16 year old at aged 57.Once just normal married men , after spending many years in Mormonism under Smith and Young they basically became Peadophiles.

    Bushman’s book has a good example of Joseph Smiths deception (page 494) …

    Joseph Smith married Sisters Eliza and Emily Patridge on March 4th 1843 without Emma his wife knowing . Soon after he must have managed to persuade Emma that he should marry these two Sisters . So with Emma’s supposed permission (coercion) he went through the wedding ceremony again in May 1843 with his wife Emma present !

    Had she known he already married them two months earlier then she may not have been persuaded to it.

    So what kind of man deceives his wife in this way.Its too repulsive to comprehend and all done with Gods supposed approval.

  6. zackc says:

    pwned!

  7. sideon says:

    I keep waiting for a TBM troll to say what they REALLY feel about women and the place where they belong:

    on their backs.

    Have a good weekend, Runtu. It’s good to BE here on your total faboo blog.

  8. Eric says:

    I find it entirely interesting that those who seek to discount the sexual nature of Joseph Smith’s many marriages completely ignore the biggest problem of all: he knowingly and purposely married women while still married to his first wife.

    If sex was not involved, what purpose would Smith have for marrying multiple women? If you take the faithful stance that he was following the commandment of God, then he would have naturally followed the commandment to multiply. What other Godly purpose would one have in getting married to women in addition to the first one you married? Why did prophets of old take the servants of their wives as their own? For companionship? To keep a friend?

    Give me a break.

  9. JLFuller says:

    I wish I had an answer for every question such as those posed here but I don’t. We will just to wait until a later time when I suspect we will be granted to know. But such things do not shake or shape my faith. Just as why black men had to wait until 1979 for the priesthood, I accept what we are told by our leadership. So be it. I will work on my own shortcomings and let others expend time and energy worrying about the sins and shortcomings of others. It just doesn’t matter.

    Some find my sentiments confusing. They can’t understand why some other men’s sins should not cast a pall over my belief. What they fail to accept is that man’s words and deeds didn’t convert me and man’s words and deeds can’t unconvert me.

  10. runtu says:

    JLFuller,

    I understand exactly where you’re coming from, as I could easily have said what you did a few years ago. If nothing else, I appreciate your at least acknowledging that these are difficult and problematic things in our church’s history. What worries me is that some people are not troubled in the least by any of this.

    • Amy says:

      I am troubled! I dont want to be right now, but I am…Just learning things about my Churchs history for the first time. Im kinda sad…. and at a loss, and very very very heart broken

  11. [...] that the marriage actually occurred. As far as which of the marriages were consummated, here is a sum-up drawn from Compton’s In Sacred Loneliness (I assume the original is fully [...]

  12. Richard Mogler says:

    This is absolute madness. This is what womens right groups have brought us to today. GOD HAS NEVER SAID THAT HAVING SEX WITH A YOUNG GIRL IS WRONG! If it was wrong I think he would have told us. You guys act like it is a choice between “Joseph Smith was a Prophet” or “Joseph Smith child molester”. This is the devil placing a false choice before you. He was both. He was a true inspiration to us all.

  13. runtu says:

    Richard,

    You seem to be the only one speaking of child molesting. God has said, I believe, even in LDS scripture, that having sex with a young girl without your wife’s knowledge or consent is wrong. Do you find such actions inspiring?

  14. Link says:

    Marrying a girl and her sister was forbidden in the Old testament law. So was sleeping with one’s step-mother. When someone in the congregation at Corinth had his father’s wife, Paul wrote that this was a kind of fornication that the Gentiles did not even do.

    So did Smith ‘marry’ married women and have sex with them?

  15. [...] A good summary of this issue is found in Todd Compton‘s book In Sacred Lonliness, the chapter titled: “Sexuality in Joseph Smith’s Marriages.” Unfortunately Signature Books removed their link to this section. But here’s a link that contains the information. [...]

  16. [...] A good summary of this issue is found in Todd Compton‘s book In Sacred Lonliness, the chapter titled: “Sexuality in Joseph Smith’s Marriages.” Unfortunately Signature Books removed their link to this section. But here’s a link that contains the information. [...]

  17. Sam Cincy says:

    Prophet Joseph Smith was really a smart man – he was lucky too – he was able to sleep with so many beautiful women happily and successfully. He was father of many children as well whereas I don’t have a woman nor I have a child – yike – I need to pray to Joseph Smith to bless me with women or a nice woman and my own biological children. He is my hero no 1.

  18. [...] written before about sexuality in Joseph Smith’s plural marriages, but until now there seemed to be definite evidence that one of his polyandrous marriages, that [...]

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