Top Ten Things Mormons and Ex-Mormons Can Agree On

10. If you’re going to put cologne on, at least wash your hands before breaking the sacrament bread.
9. That guy who played Joseph Smith in “Legacy” was really bad.
8. Your kids shouldn’t be bearing their testimony if you have to whisper it in their ears.
7. Pioneer chapels and tabernacles are usually quite beautiful and inspiring.
6. Ed Decker is a dork.
5. The world would be a better place without Living Scriptures, Melaleuca, Arbonne, and Noni Juice.
4. There will never be any conclusive evidence for the Book of Mormon other than a testimony.
3. Richard G. Scott should stop his deliberate staring into the conference cameras. Whatever effect he’s going for isn’t working.
2. Articles of Faith 11.
1. Tom Trails rocks!

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4 Responses to Top Ten Things Mormons and Ex-Mormons Can Agree On

  1. Nick says:

    “Build your own bright future, Tom Trails!”

    As bad as the theme song was, I suspect they spent most of the budget right there. “Sorry, Brother, but you know that seminary film series we were making? Well, it’s turned into a film-strip series; that’s almost as good, right?”

  2. K*tty says:

    Did anyone, besides me, have to look up what article of faith number 11 was? I swear, I use to know that all by heart. Can harldy wait to see the Tom Trails series.

  3. Ray A says:

    11. Coke isn’t evil.

    12. A BBQ is more interesting than home-teaching.

    13. The Osmonds are an embarrassment.

    14. The Jack West Slides should be burned.

    15. Robert Kirby is funny.

    16. The Catholic Church isn’t true.

    17. Joseph Smith drank alcohol.

    18. The Garden of Eden wasn’t in Missouri, and no one has ever found the Hill Cumorah.

    19. Johnny Lingo should never be shown again.

    20. Ezra Taft Benson didn’t like communists.

    21. Mormon/ex-Mormon dialogue is like Hezbollah and Zionists trying to agree on who owns what.

    22. Mormonism is either true or not true, and if it’s not true, it’s a fraud.

    23. Young men don’t always tell the truth in bishop interviews.

    24. Mormonism is something worth discussing.

    25. Mormon-related forums are addictive.

    26. Mark Hofmann fooled everyone.

    27. J. Golden Kimball rocks.

    28. Non-Australian Mormons and ex-Mormons think kangaroos graze outside chapels.

    29. Paul H. Dunn war and baseball stories are best forgotten.

    30. Serving a mission makes you realise how precious freedom and privacy are.

  4. Ray Z. says:

    I would like to make a comment on a couple of the thoughts expressed in the numbers racket.
    22, is only half thought through. Yes, if it is not true then it is a fraud. But if it is true, then we are held accountable to be true to it. Each person has to account for themselves in their discovery of truth and decisions they make according to the truth.
    4. It is obvious that the person who said this does not do much research or if so does it from a prejudicial view. There are many supporting discoveries of the Book Of Mormon truths. I am not going to enumerate them because it would take up to much space. But if you are sincere in your desires to know the truth you will find them.
    17. And Noah got drunk. It is obvious this was not something Noah did as a regular routine because the Lord said Noah was a just man and perfect in his generation and Noah walked with God. (Genesis 6:6) Joseph Smith asked the Lord in 1833 if these things were ok and the Lord answered with Section 89 in the Doctrine and Covenants. (Revelation) Again these are things you have to decide in your heart as to truth and error and suffer the consequences either good or bad.
    This is all I have to comment on.

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